Sixth Entry: Misplaced praise for the almighty mining sector and the historically constant dick-joke

As the Green Star Rises, Lin Carter, 1975, p.49

"...ringed the glad where she lay were curiously dwarfed, rising to merely two or three times the height of a full-grown man. And what were these peculiar ruins that lay strewn about, half-buried under roots and bushes? Never had she heard of cities built of stone. In the treetop regions where her race customarily made its abode, deposits of stone were unknown. The cities of the Laonese ere made of crystals - a tough resilient material derived from the sap of the sky-tall trees among whose upper branches the cities of her race were built.
     But as a priestess of the Inner Temple, as an Initiate of the Secret Mysteries, she was privy to certain antique lore preserved by the priestly scribes and archivists. Thus, she recognized certain of the stony glyphs as the work of a prehistoric race whose origins were shrouded in mysteries, as was their eventual doom; a race her people held in the highest degree of awe, and whom they know only as "the Ancient Ones."
     She half-rose from her recumbent position to examine the enigmatic ruins more closely. Then it was that her wandering gaze fell upon the magnificent form the half-naked black Calidarian. He stood motionless as an eidolon of jet, watching her lissome movements with eyes of cold yet burning quicksilver - eye within which there blazed no spark of pity or humanity -eyes fierce with unholy hunger and with the pure frenzy of desire.
     It was Ralidux!  So she had not dreamt it all, but was still at the mercies of the mad immoral who had conceived a consuming passion for her loveliness!
     She feel back on the cushion of the sward, half-faint at her discovery. As she did so, a mad lust flared up in the immobile features of the Skyman and he sprang upon her as wild beast springs upon his shrinking prey. "

"In the treetop regions where her race customarily made its abode, deposits of stone were unknown."

I'm not sure if you are aware, but Australia (where I call home) is a country rich in natural resources and our economy is benefiting is from a mining boom. There has been much talk and debate, particularly in the last few years, about the mining sector and their seemingly saviour-like status for the country and the economy. Australia did not suffer recession during the great financial crisis. Nor did it during the Asian financial crisis of '97. If you were to ask a person on the street why that is, in most instances that person will respond with 'mining', probably mention 'China' and will offer no further reasons or reasoning. It isn't that this answer is wrong - because it isn't, it's that it is grossly incomplete and borders on ignorant.

The application of Keynesian economic principles via stimulus spending is the most important reason. With the budget surplus left by the Howard Government, the Rudd Government was able to inject money, about three per cent of GDP, into the economy. The nine hundred dollar tax payer hand out was the most successful aspect in the stimulus program, in its overall mission to foster economic growth. It didn't hurt Prime Minister Rudd's opinion polls either. Overall, the stimulus program was not executed perfectly, some of he spending was excessive. But it worked; Australia did not go into recession and unemployment peaked at 5.8 %, the forecast being considerably higher. The Rudd Government was also quick to guarantee the six to seven hundred billion dollars of bank deposits in Aussie financial institutions, an unprecedented move that assuaged fears and safeguarded confidence in the banking. The existence of a superannuation program has also relieved pressure from the public purse, helping to build the aforementioned surplus.

Yes the mining sector has been, and will continue to be important to the Australian economy, but it is not an heroic saviour that has alone delivered us from economic purgatory.

"...rising to merely two or three times the height of a full-grown man."

Click here for a juvenile, yet very masculine quote from Braveheart.  Not that this movie is an authority on that period of British history (the Battle of Stirling, for instance, actually took place on a bridge that collapsed and drowned a sizeable portion of the English army, that's why it is actually known as the Battle of Stirling Bridge), but I'd like to think that if prostitution is the world's oldest profession, then dick and fart jokes would have to be amongst the world's oldest sources of humour.  The line just makes me want to knock back boilermakers and drive nails through planks of wood, of course whilst recounting stories of sexual conquest, most of which I would fabricate.  Those whose origins lie in my experience I would obviously amplify and embellish in true boy-like manly fashion.  Good times.

Fifth Entry: Popeye's surprising scholarly influence

The Riddle of the Frozen Flames, Mary & Thomas Hanshew, 1929, p.179


...have seen the two tough-looking sailormen who descended from the first-class compartment there and stepped on to the tiny platform among one or two others, he would never have dreamed of associating them with the Mr. Headland and his man Dollops who had such a short time ago left the Towers for London.
    Which is just as well, as it happened, for it was with Borkins that Cleek and Dollops were most concerned.  Upon the probability of their friendship with the butler hung the chance of their getting work.  They had left Mr. Narkom to go up to London and keep his eyes open for any clues in the bank robberies case, and had promised to report to him as soon as possible, if there were anything to be gleaned at the factory.  Mr. Narkom had expressed his doubts about it, had told Cleek that he really did not see how any human agency could possibly get Nigel Merriton off, with such appalling evidence to damn him.  And what an electrical factory could have to do with it...!
    "You forget the good Borkin's connection with the affair," returned Cleek, a trifle sharply, "..."and you forget another thing.  And that is, that I have found the man who attempted my life, and mean eventually to come to grips with him.  That is the only reason why I did not speak at the inquest this afternoon.  I am going to bide my time, but I'll have the beggar in the end.  If working for a time at an electrical factory is going to help on matters, then work there I'm going to, and Dollops with me...
    "If there should be need of me, don't forget that I am Bil Jones, sailorman, once of Jamaica, now of the Factory, Saltfeelt.  And stick to the code.  A wire will fetch me.  He hopped out upon the platform...


"...two tough looking sailormen..."


I initially struggled with this passage, nothing really prompting any thoughts.  Just as I was beginning to despair, one of my childhood heroes barged into mind, saving this blog entry and plastering my face with a childish grin.

He's Popeye, the sailor man!

About a year ago I read that the common misconception about the strength imbuing properties of spinach is the result of a typo in some 1870s German report.  Apparently the iron content of this vegetable was printed one spot too far to the right.  Wikipedia disputes this, claiming it an urban myth.  With whom do I place my naive trust, the at times hilarious Cracked.com, or the democratic aggregate knowledge centre, Wikipedia?  In these times of confusion and crisis one can only find answers at the true source of all knowledge.

Just kidding.

Stephen Fry, the greatest repository of information the world has ever known.

On  his enjoyable, amusing and informative program, QI (Quite Interesting), Fry asks his panel (usually consisting of comedians, clever people, actors and the like) which green vegetable has ten times more iron than average.  Spinach is not the correct answer, its adamant and incorrect proposal celebrated with sirens and some small measure of embarrassment for the contestant that voiced the obvious and predictable.  Here it is for you.

OK, so he doesn't actually mention the typo nor the report, our favourite sailor man isn't included at all.  On re-examination of the Wikipedia spinach article, I have noticed that the author has substantiated his claim with a reference:  a PDF from the Internet Journal of Criminology; 'Spinach, Iron and Popeye: Ironic lessons from biochemisty and history on the importance of healthy eating, healthy scepticism and adequate citation. '  Thirty-four pages detailing an articulated research response to our(my) question.  It's actually a decent read.  I now don't really care about the non/existence report now (which the author of this journal article concludes has not been found, but does not deny that it may have existed and may still materialize), being much more impressed with my forgotten hero Popeye and his capacity to prompt academic investigation and scholarly rumination.

I always thought it would be Optimus.